Carlisle City (12-04-2022)

Carlisle City 5 - 1 Willington (Northern League Division 2), Tuesday 12th April 2022

Northallerton (13-04-2019)

Northallerton 1 - 0 Washington (Northern League Division 2), Saturday 13 April 2019

Petrol estimate £24
Entry £6
Programme £1-50
Tea £1-50
Total £33

Shildon (27-08-2018)

Shildon 3 - 3 Newton Aycliffe (Northern League Division 1), Monday 27th August

Buses in Sheffield £3-80
Train (Sheffield-York) £18-40
Train (York-Darlington) £11-30
Train (Darlington-Bishop Auckland) £4-50
Shildon entry £6
Total £44

 

Washington (19-04-2014)

Washington 1 – 1 Seaham Red Star (Northern League Division 2), 19^th April 2014

I’d thought that today’s hop was based around Newcastle, but game 2 today exposed my lack of geographical knowledge of the North East. Washington play at the Nissan plant in Sunderland, which was a 30-40 minute walk from Jarrow’s ground in Boldon. Sunderland is of course a separate city to Newcastle, so I felt a sense of trepidation as I crossed the boundary into the Wearside area. I had visions of not being able to find the ground in the huge Nissan plant, but need not have worried as the path I followed (alongside a transport museum) took me directly out onto a massive car-park, where there were plenty of sign-posts to the sports complex at the back.

Entrance £5 again, but this time the programme was thrown in for free, and it was a pretty impressive publication too, printed on card, and with plenty of detailed information about today’s game. As I expected, the ground was modern and neat, with a large upstairs bar in the clubhouse building, and a decent stand of seating on the right-hand side. I liked the stand, as it had 5-6 rows of terracing at the front, with a few rows of seats running back from there.

Looking at the league table, I expected Seaham to easily overcome Washington today, as they were sitting near the top of the table. It started off that way, with Seaham (actually playing in blue) having a couple of warning shots wide from Palmer and Johnston, before Nicholson’s side foot forced a terrific save from the home keeper. Washington started to hold their own in midfield, and opened the scoring after a swift move of one and two-touch football which ended with a great volley from David Southern. The Seaham keeper prevented them doubling their lead when he tipped a deflected shot around the post. It was clearly a good day for the goalies with home keeper saving a downward header from Seaham’s Darryll Donnelly, and then a free-kick from Washington tipped around almost bang on half-time.

The weather during the first half had been bizarre in the extreme. I’d ended up wearing a warm black hat to cope with the strong wind running across the ground, and sunglasses to cope with the bright sunny weather. I must have looked a sight to an impartial observer, but nobody seemed to mind. For the second half I opted for the terraces in front of the main stand, resting my tired legs before the walk back to the metro.

The second half was as evenly contested as the first, and Washington continued to belie their league position. Seaham’s Lewis Wing threatened with a curling shot flying wide early on, before Washington’s Coughlan was dismissed for a second yellow card. It looked like a soft one to me – either way, the impressive-looking home side were down to 10 men for this half. Seaham had a spell of possession and chances, and converted when Nicholson volleyed in to make it 1-1. Strangely from this point on, the chances all seemed to fall to Washington, who were utterly resolute in their attacking and desire to score another.  James Farley volleyed over, before his flicked header over an onrushing keeper didn’t quite reach the net.  Southern’s free kick flew over, before a tame right foot shot from Michael Roberts went wide. It finished 1-1, and the game was again a credit to this league. I headed for the exit, and off to the metro to make it back to Sheffield as early as possible. As I left the ground I heard a kid (presumably on the full ground-hop) say to a friend – ‘I think this is my second favourite ground this weekend’. I wonder what the first was!

Jarrow Roofing (19-04-2014)

Jarrow Roofing 1 – 0 Heaton Stannington (Northern League Division 2), 19^th April 2014

Train ticket (Sheffield-Brockley Whins) = £62-50

Jarrow tea = £1

Washington tea = 80p

Washington Oxo = 50p

Greggs snacks = £3

Jarrow entrance = £5

Washington entrance = £5 (programme included!)

Magazine at Jarrow = £2-50

Total hop costs = £80-30

Sloping towards the end of the season, I opted to do a couple of the Saturday games on the NL Easter hop. I’d briefly flirted with the idea of doing the whole weekend or at least a couple of days, but eventually decided that I’d go for the option which enabled me to be back home for the evening. Jarrow’s ground is actually in the Boldon area of Newcastle, and a short walk from Brockley Whins metro station. As I made my way to the ground, I found myself giving directions to fellow football tourists to a ground I’d never been to before – I must look like I know where I’m going!

The ground was situated at the end of a short track off the road, adjacent to a council pitch with muddy goal-mouths, and Boldon CA FC (who play in the Wearside League). There seemed to be a progression in the standard of grounds as you walked further down the track. A fiver for entry in a narrow gate at the side, and this immediately reminded me of Marske United. Either side of the entrance gate were narrow sections of covered terraces, shielded by robust corrugated iron sheets, painted blue. Directly opposite the entrance was a neat blue and yellow stand, and to my left were a few plastic seats at the front of the terraces. This was another memorable ground in the North-East.

After getting a cup of tea, I attempted to get a programme, but to no avail as they had all sold out. Fortunately I noticed a whiteboard near the entrance with the line-ups listed, so out came the iPod for a photo. I was also able to pick up a copy of the 3^rd issue of ‘The Football Pink’ for £2-50, which was full of interesting articles by bloggers and fans. The home side started strongest, with Shaun Heads forcing a clearance off the line early on, and taking the lead when Andy Appleby latched onto a slide-rule pass to give them the advantage. Heaton did have periods of possession, but couldn’t forge any meaningful opportunities, with the closest chance coming when a long-ranger from Paul Blakey drifted wide. Jarrow asserted themselves again when McBryde hit the post with a first time shot, and then had a volley saved soon after. They were well-organised, and seemed to be playing with Jamie Marshall as a deep-lying ‘sweeping’ midfielder which was very effective. Heaton had a couple of half-chances before the break, with a dragged shot from McBryde saved before he fired a free kick at the keeper on 43 minutes.

The second half wasn’t great to be honest, though the game did start to open up. An innocuous volley from Jarrow’s Myers was saved almost straight after half-time, and then Heaton’s Johnson fired massively wide, followed by a proverbial drop-goal by Kieran Weekes (over and out). Jarrow’s Stephen Young opened up Heaton when he cut in from the right and forced a save from Shaun Backhouse, while Gardiner hit another chance wide from the resulting corner. Heaton had a couple of golden opportunities towards the end, and perhaps could have nicked a point here. McKenna’s shot was well-saved by a nerveless Andy Hunter, before Jonathan Wright couldn’t connect with a dipping cross across the penalty box. Jarrow wrapped up the win, and the hoppers started to stream for the exits on the way to the next ground at Washington FC.

Darlington RA (01-03-2014)

Darlington Railway Athletic 2 – 3 Thornaby (Northern League Division 2), 1^st March 2014

As we approached Darlington’s Brinkburn Road ground at about 5.30pm, there was still some light just about visible, which made a nice change from the dark afternoons of the past winter. I took a decent snap of the stand behind the near goal, which seemed to have had a couple of rows of seats rolled into it. Like many in this league, Darlington RA is a club which started as a works social club, before emerging as a community football club as local industry declined. I wonder if any of the current team actually work for the local railway these days? As it was dinner-time, I opted to try out the club cuisine, and settled down with a minced beef pie and a pork pie to keep me going. It seemed to be pretty much the only food on offer at the bar, but at £2 it was tasty and well worth the investment. A pint of Guinness washed it down very nicely, and I was able to sit and enjoy the Southampton-Liverpool game in the bustling bar. For once, I wasn’t complaining at the 5.30 kick off!

It was with trepidation that I left the bar and stepped out into the cold in time for kick off here. The temperature had dropped considerably since leaving the ground at Stokesley, and it was shaping up to be a cold evening. Maybe spring had not arrived just yet. No under-armour again, so I was relying on my Quechua jacket and hat and gloves to keep me warm. The game was well worth the wait in the cold. Thornaby (15^th in the league) started strongly, taking the lead with a header by Lee Blythway on 10 minutes, doubling it on 20 minutes, with a goal from Richard Walker. This was a turn-up for the books, as Darlington RA were 10^th in the league, and were probably marginal favourites for this one. The pace of the game was astonishing, and made this a really entertaining affair. Slowly, Darlington forced their way back into the game, and got a goal back on 38 minutes via their number 9 Steve Allison. David Webster then swivelled and shot, forcing a diving save from the away keeper. 2-1 at half-time and this was anyone’s game.

Darlington started the second-half as they had begun the first, and Webster fired an early free-kick just wide, before Adam Sakr hit straight at the keeper when it looked easier to score. Impressively, both teams maintained the pace and aggression of the first-half. For all their efforts, Darlington couldn’t find an equaliser against a bullish Thornaby side, and Liam Woodhouse made it 3-1 to the away side with a neatly slotted in goal on 83 minutes. Game over? Not quite – on 84 minutes, Allison grabbed his second of the game to set up an open finish to the match. Thornaby’s Joseph Melvin missed a great chance to make it 4-2 when he was completely unmarked inside the area. After that, the away keeper (Michael Duff) received a yellow card for time-wasting in his over-elaborate preparations for a free-kick. It finished 3-2 to Thornaby, in what had been a hard-fought and open encounter. Anyone can beat anyone in this league.

I note that the ground-hoppers had brought bad fortune to all the home sides today, as they had all lost! Hopefully that will be compensated for by the extra revenue brought by clubs’ participation in the ‘hop’. I trudged back to the coach back to Darlington station (improbably parked behind the stand I’d photographed earlier), and then walked a couple of miles to the local Travelodge. On a bright Sunday morning (the day of the League Cup final as it happens) I made my way back to the station, where I had breakfast and then made my way back to Sheffield in time for lunch. This had been another terrific hop – well done to the organisers, who must spend ages on planning and preparation. I may consider doing a part of the Easter 2014 hop when it comes around.

Stokesley (01-03-2014)

Stokesley 1 – 2 Tow Law Town (Northern League Division 2), 1^st March 2014

The second game of the October ground-hop (at West Allotment Celtic) was the highlight of that day, so I was optimistic that today’s game 2 would be equally as good. It didn’t let me down at all! After a coach ride from Marske, we arrived in plenty of time at Stokesley’s Broughton Road ground for the 2.30 kick off. After a cup of tea from a china mug – 50p! – I wandered around for some pictures before all the other hoppers arrived. The clubhouse actually adjoined the headquarters of the North Yorkshire County FA, so I took a photo for posterity. Was this the North-East or Yorkshire? Darlington and Middlesbrough were fairly close, but equally the ground was nestled close to the Yorkshire dales. This made it probably the most scenic ground I’d seen in the 2013-14 season thus far. The ground itself was neat and well-maintained, bounded by a wooden fence and with a solid walkway around the edge. The sun was shining, and despite the chilly breeze, it felt that spring was somewhere on the horizon.

 The game was eventful and competitive, and I’ve come to expect no less from the Northern League. Both teams looked evenly matched from the start, with Stokesley’s Reece Kelly firing over on 8 minutes, before Greg Peel hit wide shortly after.  Tow Law looked well-organised and unrattled by the early chances, and took the lead on 20 minutes. Stokesley continued to forge chances, with Connor Hood firing another shot over. They just couldn’t quite capitalise on their possession in the final third. This came back to bite them when Tow Law doubled their lead after Dean Thexton slotted in from a corner, and very nearly made it 3-0 when they hit the post with a header. 2-0 at half-time, and I was hoping this wasn’t going to turn into a rout like the game at Mount Pleasant.

The second half was superb, and both teams continued to play neat and organised football. Stokesley’s Matthew Robinson had a shot saved shortly after the break, before Simon Ord missed a chance to extend their lead on 60 minutes. Greg Upton, who seemed to be at the centre of action in the second half, then missed a half-chance to reduce the deficit. Tow Law were still strong in defence, but Stokesley now looked like they were capable of scoring. After some great passing through midfield, Upton made it 2-1 when he placed a terrific header past a stranded Joseph Longstaff. There was a game on now, and I was willing Stokesley to score as they had worked so hard for the whole game. Half-chance after half-chance was missed, and they couldn’t quite break down a stubborn Tow Law defence. Usually in these situations it comes down to one clear-cut chance, and this time it fell to Connor Hood in the 90^th minute. It was a free header, and he should have at least forced a save, but instead managed to head over the bar. That was the chance, and almost immediately as the goal kick was taken the final whistle was blown. Unlucky Stokesley, who had fought and played well for the whole game. Still I’d seen another decent game, and discovered another little gem of a ground. Onwards to Darlington!

Marske United (01-03-2014)

Marske United 0 – 4 Guisborough (Northern League Division 1), 1^st March 2014

Total costs for ground-hop = £126-04

Transport & match ticket = £25

Train ticket (Sheffield-Darlington) = £47-50

Travelodge = £39

Breakfast = £6-84

Tea at Marske = £1

Tea at Stokesley = 50p

Bovril at Stokesley = 70p

Hot chocolate at RA = £1

Pies at RA = £2

Guinness at RA = £2-50

After the 4-game Tyneside hop back in October, I was looking forward to this hop around Darlington & Cleveland, particularly getting to grounds which were off the beaten track. The day started at 5.50am in Sheffield to ensure I arrive for the 9.30 coach from Darlington. Bleary-eyed and blinking, I made it to the coach with ticket in hand, and was looking forward to the day with great anticipation.

Game 1 was at Marske-by-the-Sea, which sits between Redcar and Saltburn, and is just under an hour’s drive from Darlington. The ‘hopper’ coach arrived at the ground around 10.30, after a neat bit of reversing by the coach driver – how he managed to swing the coach past parked cars and into a narrow lane is still beyond me. Marske’s GEC Stadium (or Mount Pleasant if you disregard the sponsor’s name) was a somewhat ramshackle ground with plenty of character – it reminded me of Radford FC’s ground I’d visited back in December. There were a couple of levels of terracing as you walked round past the main stand, and on the far side the terracing consisted of an earth bank, just above the two dug-outs. The most distinctive feature was a blue sign near the entrance with painted gold lettering – asking spectators to mind their language, and to enjoy their day. It was like something out of a different era.

Today’s game was a local derby between Marske (MUFC!) and their neighbours Guisborough, so should be a tasty affair. The away side started more brightly, with Daniel Johnson hitting just wide early on, before a loose back-pass nearly put Marske ahead against the run of play. There was a palpable sense of frustration as both sides started to squander possession, and seemed hesitant to make the killer pass. ‘Hit the bloody thing’ yelled an old bloke next to me as more possession was wasted. Johnson deservedly made it 1-0 to Guisborough when he rounded the keeper, and the game really turned their way when Markse’s Liam O’Sullivan was sent off after tangling with an away striker. So far, Marske had held their own, but the goal and the sending off turned the game completely. The away side had further chances before half-time when Johnson was foiled by the Robert Dean in the home goal, and when Leon Carling (great name!) headed over just before the break.

The second half definitely tipped the way of Guisborough, and it was inevitable when they doubled their lead on 63 minutes with a goal direct from a corner. No way back for Marske now, and the game started to get increasingly broken up by poor fouls and late challenges. Daniel Johnson was a constant thorn in the side of the home defence, and the frustration showed when his namesake Johnson was booked for clattering him. Adam Gell fired two efforts wide shortly after, before Michael Roberts made it 3-0 and confirm a resounding victory. Johnson, who had been a constant threat throughout, then took a superb goal when clean through, curling it beautifully round the keeper. 4-0 and it had turned into a lunchtime trouncing for the unfortunate Marske. Back to the coach and on to game 2 at Stokesley.

Newcastle Benfield (26-10-2013)

Newcastle Benfield 2 – 1 Benfield (Northern League Division 1), 26^th October 2013

The final game of the Tyneside ground-hop was at Newcastle Benfield’s ground – not far from where I’d started the day at Chillingdon Road. There was enough of a gap between the Team Northumbria-Whitley Bay match and this one, so I had time to get fish and chips of the way. The shop seemed to be doing a good passing trade as many hungry hoppers ambled past. Benfield’s ground was located circa 2 miles from Team Northumbria, at the end of a cul-de-sac, with covered seating on the right, and nets on the near side. This was much what I expected from a Northern League ground.

After finishing off my chips, and the remainder of my oxo, I settled down for this one. To be honest, I was pretty exhausted after the run of games and was looking forward to reaching the B&B in time for Match of the Day. This game again proved competitive and tough. Morpeth threatened early when their number 9 hit straight at the keeper after a poke on the floor. The home side took the lead on 8 minutes, and doubled it almost immediately when number 9 slotted in on half an hour. Morpeth’s 10 scored after a mistake from the keeper to make it 2-1 on 34 minutes, and their number 9 missed a chance to equalise just before half-time. The second half definitely slackened off a bit in terms of pace and aggression and with it went my concentration levels. I discovered how difficult it is to focus on four football matches in a single day - hence the lack of any second half analysis!

I headed off to the B&B in Gateshead, where it turned out the proprietor was involved in Dunston UTS. I was relieved to put my feet up in the warm, have a cup of tea, and settle down for MoTD. On my way back to Newcastle station in the morning (along the banks of the Tyne), I managed to get a decent shot of Dunston’s ground. It was glorious sunshine as I left Newcastle, and even when I arrived in Sheffield. On the weekend that the clocks changed, this trip signalled the end of Autumn, and the imminent onset of winter.

It had been quite an experience, and I’d definitely do this again. Not sure if I have the stamina for one of the Easter hops, but I’d definitely do 3-4 in a day again. Well done to the organisers of this day from a grateful hopper!

West Allotment Celtic (26-10-2013)

West Allotment Celtic 0 – 0 North Shields (Northern League Division 2), 26^th October 2013

Before visiting West Allotment Celtic for the second game of the North Tyneside hop, I had a clear idea of what the ground would look like. I imagined that the team played to the West of an old allotment which was cultivated to give the appearance of green stripes. The reality – I have to say – was far more interesting.

After the Heaton Stannington game, I had begun to wake up from my early start, helped by the short walk to West Allotment’s ground. The club was well-prepared for the influx of today, with a dedicated turnstile for the groundhoppers. The entrance opened out onto a flat section of terracing on an embankment – to my right was a small section of covered terracing, while on the left was a clubhouse and tea bar. The pitch was down a steep embankment, and was surrounded by the usual concrete walkway, sitting next to a cricket pitch which stretched into the distance. No allotment as I had quaintly imagined! I immediately liked this ground as it had a lot of character, and one where there was a friendly welcome from the club. Team sheets were available for 10p, and I even bought a copy of the club magazine ‘Three Miles West’ – pretty impressive to have a club magazine at this level. I was pleasantly surprised to hear the teams announced over a clear and audible PA system, which made a nice change. After sitting to take a break and eat my sandwich, I took my place on the far right corner flag closest to the embankment. This should be a good game today, as both teams were in and around the top 6 and I wasn’t disappointed.

 

The game was played at a high pace, and good quality as both teams kept the ball on the floor. Tackles were enthusiastic to say the least, with the referee clearly deciding to let the game flow a bit. North Shields created the first opportunities, with Holmes and Tait both having shots smothered by the home keeper. West Allotment were equal to the task, and Liam Hudson fired over before Ian Dunn missed another chance on the 40 minute mark. Just before half-time, North Shield’s Gareth Bainbridge took a great first touch to take the ball down in the area before firing an angled shot just wide. This was a very evenly balanced game, turning into a very watchable game of football.

The second half opened out even more, with chances being exchanged tit-for-tat. North Shield’s Daniel Smart rounded the keeper but couldn’t finish, before Sean Reid for West Allotment hit a stinging shot straight at the keeper. West Allotment hit another shot wide, while they had a free-kick deflected just wide. West Allotment were starting to seize control, and created more chances – Paul Stoneman hitting straight at the keeper, while Dormand did fantastically well to rob the ball in midfield, ending up shooting just over. The home keeper (Ryan Beal) was subbed off with around 10 minutes to go, and looking back at my notes, it looked like they had started to lose a bit of momentum. North Shields threatened briefly, scoring an offside goal which had been deflected off a post, before a neat flick from a corner was foiled by the new keeper. It finished 0-0, and it was one of those goalless draws which are thoroughly watchable and entertaining. The reality was the teams had probably cancelled each other out, but they had put on a decent performance.

This had certainly exploded two of the great myths in English football at the moment. Firstly, that English teams play 'kick-and-rush' route 1 football - today's game had been played on the floor, with creative movement of the ball throughout. And (in the TalkSport version of football) the myth that Northern football is in a steady decline. Today I saw evidence of the strength of teams in the North-East, and was really impressed with my first games in the Northern League. In a procession of ground-hoppers, I trudged onwards to the next ground at Coach Lane (Team Northumbria). This was definitely the highlight of the North Tyneside hop – a ground with plenty of character, friendly folk and a decent game of football.

Team Northumbria (26-10-2013)

Team Northumbria 3 – 4 Whitley Bay, Northern League Division 1 (26^th October 2013)

I’ve always liked the idea of a team representing an entire county, so I was looking forward to this game at Team Northumbria. The third game of the North Tyneside ground-hop brought us into the top Northern League division at Coach Lane, in what proved to be something of a classic encounter. A short walk from West Allotment Celtic, Coach Lane is actually on the campus of Northumbria University, as the team are technically part of the university set-up. This is similar to Team Bath, who King’s Lynn had encountered a couple of years earlier in the Southern League. The ground was not quite as idiosyncratic as West Allotment’s, but was certainly modern and neatly laid-out. Entrance was through a turnstile (yes, actually a turnstile, not just a table!) next to a sports centre – to my right was a short section of covered seating, and round the pitch perimeter was the usual paved area. The grounds-men here had clearly looked after the pitch, which was a healthy bright green, with hardly any of the muddy patches we’d seen at Heaton.

After a brief sit-down to gather my energies for this game, I took up my place just along from the seated area – strategically positioned in front of the tea van! The game was terrific, played at a fast pace and with great football from both sides. Team Northumbria took the lead on 7 minutes, with their number 8 slotting in, while Whitley Bay tested the home keeper with a header which was saved. The away side were sending various warning shots, and duly equalised on 15 minutes. This was looking like a very evenly balanced match today. The home side responded with another goal on 21 minutes, following a dribble into the area, before Whitley Bay made it 2-2 with a penalty from number 10. Both teams forced further saves from the keepers before the half-time whistle went.

This had been a frenetic game of football so far, and it continued in this way in the second half. As the shadows on the ground grew a bit longer, Whitley Bay’s number 10 made it 3-2 on 55 minutes, before his opposite number for Team Northumbria made it an incredible 3-3 after a mazy run into the penalty area. The away side looked like they might sneak it, and could have made it 4 when their number 10 rounded the keeper and fired over an empty goal. It wouldn’t matter, as the same player scored to make it 4-3 with a diving header late on. Team Northumbria weren’t done yet, and forced a superb tip over from the away keeper, and then hit the crossbar in the 90^th minute. A crowd of 396 saw this game, in what was another great advert for the Northern League with goals galore. 3 games down, and 1 to go!

Heaton (26-10-2013)

Heaton Stannington 3 – 0 Birtley, Northern League Division 2 (26^th October 2013)

Total costs for the Newcastle ground-hop = £142-10

Ground-hop ticket: £20

iPaper: 30p

B&B accommodation: £30

Metro ticket: £2-50

Train ticket: £61
Taxi: £11-60

Tea and sausage sandwich at Team Northumbria: £3

Fish and chips: £5-60

Tea at Heaton: £1
Tea at Newcastle Benfield: £1

Team-sheet at West Allotment: 10p

‘Three Miles West Magazine’: £2
'Northern Conquest Magazine’: £4

Game one of my first ‘ground-hop’ weekend in Newcastle – the North Tyneside hop, organised to celebrate the 125^th anniversary of the Northern League. I started at the pre-dawn time of 5.45am to make the 10.30am kick-off, and after a 2 hour train journey from Sheffield, just made it on time. Heaton Stannington’s Grounsell Park is located a short walk from Chillingham Road on the Newcastle metro system, and was fairly easy to find. The ground was positively bustling with ground-hoppers from all over the country judging by the accents.

After collecting my programmes for the day (in a pack of 4), I took up my place on the corner flag and surveyed the ground. The ground had the usual metal pole round the pitch, and on the opposite side to the entrance there was a grassy embankment which looked fairly muddy this morning. The entrance side had a short section of terracing, and an even shorter section of wooden decking, with spectators crammed in. The club had only recently joined the Northern League, so obviously hadn’t had the capacity to develop facilities as they might have liked. Still, I had received a friendly welcome on entering, and the atmosphere was jovial and relaxed.

The game was rather less friendly, and was fiercely contested by both teams. Heaton, in black and white stripes, took the lead early on when their number 9 slotted in a penalty. The away side – in light blue shirts – created a couple of chances, with numbers 5 and 9 missing half-chances. The home side made it 2-0 shortly after, and were looking like they would add to their tally when their number 3 (a Joe Hart lookalike) hit over from just inside the box. Birtley’s number 9 missed a chance when clean through on the keeper, and so they went in 2 nil down at half-time. It was a good competitive game so far, if made a little bit scrappier by the state of the pitch.

Heaton came out looking determined to get the third goal, with numbers 8 and 9 firing over just after the break. Birtley did create the odd chance, but their 9 wasted another chance when he took too many touches in an over-elaborate dribble inside the penalty area. Then – in the controversial moment of the match - a Birtley player swung a fist at one of the Heaton attackers, catching him in the jaw. The referee missed the incident, and was consulting his linesman on what had happened when the Birtley bench signalled a substitution, conveniently of the offending player. To much outrage from the home bench, and even the neutral ground-hoppers, the referee let the substitution go ahead, and the hot-headed Birtley player escaped a certain red-card. The moment was captured on video, and ended up on the Northern Echo website! It later transpired that the player had broken his opponent’s jaw in the attack, so there must have been some impact for that to happen.

There was still a game going on here, and Birtley’s number 15 had a shot well-saved by the home keeper, before missing an absolute sitter shortly after. Heaton looked fired up by the injustice of the missing red card, and made it 3 nil on 83 minutes, with their number 9 grabbing his second of the game. Thanks to the bobbly pitch, their number 5 almost gifted a consolation to Birtley late on when a back-pass went awry. Then Heaton’s number 11 hit the away post on 90 minutes after an excellent dribble into the box. This had been a tough game, and not exactly entertaining, but had been a good start to the day. Time for a breather before the next game at West Allotment Celtic at 1.15pm.